The most interesting person I talk to = Myself

Last week I was driving to work and happened to see a man, of middle age I might assume, who was walking along the road and clearly having a conversation with no one other than himself. My immediate thoughts were two: First, I realize that such behaviour could be indicative of the gentleman's well-being being less than well. In other words, perhaps he was mentally unwell and thus I felt both concern and pity for him. Mental illness can be a very tough cross to carry. The second thought I had was--perhaps this man is not affected by mental illness, but he merely is having a conversation with himself. What is the difference between the first and the second thought? Well, in the case of the second, it is the fact that everyone has conversations with him/herself at some point in life.

You might find that statement very incredulous on first-read. But, read again, Dear Reader, that statement and think on these questions for a moment: Have you ever, replayed a conversation in your head, perhaps imagining what else you might have been able to say instead of the thing that you actually said (similar to what Meg Ryan/Kathleen Kelly describes in this scene in "You Got Mail")? Or, perhaps you are the type who, like Mr. Collins of Pride and Prejudice, (see 3:28-3:50) is inclined to prep yourself for a forthcoming conversation by anticipating conversation topics, questions and answers?

If you are inclined to deny that you have ever done any of the aforementioned behaviours, then I am inclined to call you a liar because I do believe that we all, at some point in our lives before we die, have a conversation with ourselves. I am not talking about the kind of conversations that little kids have with their imaginary friends. I am talking more about a running dialogue about our lives that can sometimes take place within our brains. And it is okay if we do this (responsibly and in moderation, of course, we don't want to be too quirky). Don't be ashamed if you have ever found yourself lost in a conversation in your head, whether it be as you are driving in the car, out on a run, lying in bed at night, or primping in front of the mirror like this girl

Say it loud and say it proud!

You know what else? I have tested this theory and proven it true. As I was writing this blog, my roommate asked me about today's topic and so I told her: "I am asking people to accept the fact that we all have conversations with ourselves and that it is okay to be honest with each other about it." And you know what? before I had finished getting the sentence out of my mouth she was agreeing with me. No, we are not just two crazy people who live together. We are quite normal, or so we are told (unless we are surrounded by the same liars who would deny that they have conversations with themselves). But, whatever, the fact still remains: I have also checked out this theory with other people and the consensus is that normal people can have conversations with themselves.

I mean, if you really think about it, having a conversation with yourself is pretty much 70% of what blogging is. Yeah, sure, you could have readers who you are talking to, but can you actually call blogging a conversation with another person? Do you really know who those readers are? Do they even exist? For those of us who still have relatively low counts in our "Followers" list and "Comments" boxes, I would venture a guess that a majority of our posts are glorified conversations with ourselves (for a more intellectual conversation on this topic see here). Who am I to think that anyone would remotely care about what I am thinking about, so much so that they would want to spend their time reading one of my blog posts? (Well, apparently you do since you are reading this. So don't take that as an insult or anything).

The funny thing about having a blog--whether it is about decorating or anything else--is that once you have a blog, you get sucked into this mindset of thinking about how and what would please your readers to read about on your blog. I want to please my readers. I want it to be worth your time to read my blog. I don't think this desire is a bad one. Yet, this translates into my having 'moments of inspiration' in which I think, "Oh! I could totally blog about this!" And then I proceed to start planning out in my head all of the descriptions and other witty things I could say in this prospective post which would please the reader and entice them to become more of a follower of my blog. But, at the end of the day, it is just a conversation with myself in my head because, although my "Followers", "Comments" and blog stats tell me that some people read my posts, the numbers are sparing as of the moment. I don't know all of the readers and I really don't know how many readers of mine actually exist.

So, at least for the time being, this blog is largely a conversation that I am having with myself that the occasional reader is privy to watching in on, similar to the way in which I watched in on the conversation that the man on the side of the road was having with himself (assuming, of course, that he wasn't mentally ill). And, for that reason, I hope that my taking ownership of my conversations with myself gives you permission to not feel weird or crazy (unless you actually are weird or crazy) when you catch yourself having your next conversation with yourself. Don't deny or be harsh on yourself, just accept the fact that it is part of human life to every-so-often converse with your oh-so-interesting-self.